{31 Days of Hospitality} Day 19 ~ Let's Make It Work

Not to Impress, But to Bless

Oh my.  I am (almost) speechless.  

Have you read the posts of those who wrote about hospitality in the Linky Party that began yesterday?  Then you may be (almost) speechless too.  (If you haven't read them, go read now...before you read another word here.  You'll be inspired.)

They shared some tips, but they also shared their thoughts about hospitality and what it is and how they practice it or how they want to practice it more.  And I was literally in tears at times. I have been writing about hospitality for the past 18 days, but my resolve to open my home has been made more sure.  

Thank you, ladies, for taking the time to share from your hearts.  

(It's not too late to join in!  The Linky Party will be open through Sunday night, so link away!) 

I have something else to tell you!  On Monday, I will be having a guest poster.  I am so excited about this!  

Brenda of Coffee Tea Books & Me will be writing here!  

I have been reading Brenda's blog for quite some time, and her thoughtful posts are often a source of inspiration.  Among many other things, she has written about an ingenious hospitality concept, so I was delighted when she accepted my invitation to guest post.  You won't want to miss it.  

Now for today's topic...

Let's Make It Work!

By now we know that the goal of hospitality is to bless others, but we're still left with our own limitations.  Not excuses, but true limitations.  

May I suggest to you that you have your very own style of hospitality?  You do!  And your style can be totally different than that of your neighbor or your sister-in-law.  

My friend Barbara can host a tea that is as beautiful and as tasty as that of any tea room, and she delights in doing it. But if you don't have a china tea pot or the gumption to make four kinds of finger sandwiches and a variety of sweets, that's okay.  Maybe you can serve a cup of tea or coffee and a plate of cookies.  

You don't enjoy formal dinner parties?  No problem.  Plan to serve something simple that your own family enjoys.  Chances are your guests will enjoy it too.  Remember: Simple fare is often the best choice.  And don't be afraid to ask what foods your guests like.  

Find your style!  

Maybe your husband likes to barbecue.  Then plan simple backyard get-togethers.

If you get overwhelmed with a lot of cooking (or don't like to cook), host covered dish affairs. Or order pizza!  (Can you really be a good hostess and serve carryout pizza?  Of course you can!)

Perhaps you love to cook, have heirloom silver and fine china,  and get excited about gourmet entertaining.  Then that's your style...go ahead and lavish your guests!  

It's not really important what your style is.  It's more important that you are open to opportunities to open your home for the purpose of blessing and serving others.  

May I also suggest that there are seasons for different kinds of hospitality? Indeed there are!  As life changes, as our circumstances change, our hospitality reflects that.  

Finances affect our hospitality.  Don't I know it!  There were times when we were...well, I don't want a pity party, but let's just say that at times our coffers were empty.  But even in the lean (quite lean) years, we occasionally invited another couple over for a simple dinner.  Or we invited someone for dessert after church.  The frequency of invitations as well as the food that was served reflected our financial challenges, but we tried to open our home when we could.  Fellowship doesn't cost very much monetarily, but it is rich.

The layout and size of our house affects our hospitality.  My parents live in a lovely home, and for years theirs was the hub of all family gatherings.  But as the extended family grew...and grew (from 4 to 26 and growing), we began hosting.  Not that our house is large.  It isn't.  But we do have a large farmhouse kitchen and almost all events are centered there.  Some people may eat at the dining room table, but after the meal, we usually drag the chairs from the small dining room and place them all around the kitchen and hang out together and eat dessert from our laps.

Do you know that you can have overnight guests even if you only have one bathroom?  (Ask me how I know.)

So your table only seats four.  Why don't you place a small vase of fresh flowers or herbs from your yard in the middle of that table, and invite another couple to dinner, or a few ladies for coffee?  There are a few kiddos in the group?  I have found that children are not particular about where they eat (child-size folding table, floor pillows, coffee table while sitting on the floor, piano bench/table, vinyl tablecloth laid out "picnic" style on the floor...) as long as they are with one another.  Or you could serve the food from that table-for-four and let all the guests eat on TV trays or from their laps. (Just keep in mind the messiness factor when planning the menu.  And use "real" plates or sturdy paper/plastic ones.)

Does health alter the season of hospitality?  Absolutely.  Illness, chronic or acute, affects the ability to serve in our homes.  Those are things that are out of our control.  Poor health may require one to scale back, doing nothing elaborate.  It may demand that we limit the number of people, or the frequency of invitations.  Or it could even mean that one must cease from "entertaining."

However, even at that point, a warm and welcoming heart can still make a difference.

I have told you of my friend Ann who passed away last December after seven years with ALS.  It was my privilege to help Ann a bit with some shopping.  But every time I went into her home, she ministered to me.  She shared encouragement, a listening ear, love, the love of Christ.  No she wasn't serving cake and coffee, but she was serving nonetheless.

Yes, seasons of life affect hospitality, but they do not prevent it.  

So what are your limitations as you extend hospitality?  Can you make it work?

{31 Days of Hospitality} Day 18 ~ YOUR Hospitality Tips

It's party day!

As promised, I have put out the welcome mat...

...and served up some yummy hors d'oeuvres.

~ cream cheese with green pepper jelly and crackers ~

Oh, you'd like the recipe?

Sure, I'll share!

Thanks to Tipnut for  free recipe template!  I used PicMonkey to add my own recipe.

Now it's YOUR turn to chat about hospitality!

Just add the link to your hospitality post below.  

(Please link the URL of your post, not your blog, so that guests who come to the party later will be able to find the right topic.)
I'll be leaving the Linky party open through Sunday night.

I am inviting anyone who doesn't have a blog to leave their best hospitality tip in the comments, 

so PLEASE take a moment to read those too!

{31 Days of Hospitality} Day 17 ~ White Dishes, Etc. (With the Emphasis on Etc.)

The party is tomorrow!

The Linky party where YOU are the honored guests!

I have been talking all month about the ins and the outs, the ups and the downs of hospitality.  

But tomorrow it's YOUR turn!  

I am inviting YOU to write a post sharing your own tips for hospitality.  

Then come over here tomorrow, October 18, and link up.  

If you don't have a blog, come and join the party anyway!  

Just write your tips in the comment section.  

(I'll be reminding everyone to take a peek there too.)  

I'll be putting out the welcome mat...and I might even serve hors d'oeuvres! 

Won't it be fun to learn some great hospitality tips and secrets? 

And now, on to today's topic...

Et cetera = "and the rest"

If you decide to plan your table settings around basic white dishes, then "the rest" kind of follows right along, easy peasy.  

"And the rest" might be finding brown cloth napkins on the clearance rack at Target, $1.74 for a package of four!  Of course, you buy four packages of four so you'll have enough to use at Thanksgiving, although you  may be amazed at how many times you'll use them for other occasions.

"And the rest" might be a $3.00 summer tablecloth, also on clearance, that you purchase at Marshalls in October.

"And the rest" might also be tan linen hemstitch tablecloths that you keep your eye on for weeks, for months, until one day you see that they are on sale and they are your price.  

"And the rest" could be a scarf (as in a fashion scarf that most people use to accessorize an outfit) that is snatched from the rack (yep, the clearance rack...do you see a pattern?) to be used as a table runner...someday.

"And the rest" might be serving platters and accent dishes that you pick up here and there, sometimes on sale, sometimes at a yard sale, sometimes at a thrift store, sometimes at a discount store, and sometimes you just go ahead and pay full price for a plate or a bowl that is calling your name simply because you love it and you know that you'll get lots of mileage from it.

"And the rest" could even be family treasures that have ended up at your house, or a birthday gift from your mother-in-law who knows that you love serving pieces.

But once you have your feelers out for "et cetera," I guarantee that you'll find lots of ways to make those white dishes pop!  

{31 Days of Hospitality} Day 16 ~ Scented Soaps

Not to Impress, But to Bless

I love to think that my guests will feel a little pampered when they spend time in our home.  One small way that I pamper is by providing a wonderfully scented hand soap at the bathroom sink.  

Just before guests arrive, I do a last minute check of the bathroom, to be sure that it looks clean and tidy, fresh towels are hanging, and a bottle of aromatic soap is on the farmhouse sink.  

It really is a low cost way to pamper.  

Several times a year, Bath & Body Works runs a sale on their hand soaps at five for $15.  Does $3 per bottle still sound like too much?  Well, if the scented soap goes out only when company is expected, it can last for quite a while!

I have also picked up inexpensive soaps at Marshalls, HomeGoods, and Christmas Tree Shop. Our local Walmart carries Mrs. Meyer's hand soaps, which I have purchased a few times.

You know, even a little person can appreciate a special touch.  A few weeks ago it was our family's turn to host our homeschool co-op.  When my grandson Ben (3) washed his hands before lunch, Bekah reports that he closed his eyes and gushed, "Mmmmmmmmm...smells like pears!"  

It is a pleasure to pamper your guests!

Are you getting ready for the party?

Two more days!

(Click button for details.)  

  

{31 Days of Hospitality} Day 15 ~ White Dishes, Etc.

Not to Impress, But to Bless

Source

In a large mall on one of our annual mother/daughter Christmas shopping trips, we found ourselves in front of the window display of the Crate and Barrel store.  Mom, my sister Linda, and I (dish lovers all), stood staring at a gorgeous table decked out for Thanksgiving.  As I drooled over the display, something dawned on me.  The table was dreamy, full of color and texture and seasonal touches, warm and inviting...and they had used only white dishes!  

It was an epiphany for me!

Okay, I'll tone it down a bit.  ~smile~  But it did change my thinking about table settings.  Instead of  trying to coordinate my table settings with patterned or colored dishes, why not get a basic collection of white dishes?  Then I could use any color or theme I wanted for each occasion by simply changing up the table linens (fabric or paper), the centerpiece, and accent serving pieces.

That spring, I went to a Pfaltzgraff outlet store and purchased two sets of white dishes in the Heritage pattern.  A few times, I added to my collection of dinner plates, buying most for a couple of dollars per plate at the same outlet.  From Mom, I have also acquired a few more white plates in different patterns, some old, some new.

I love the versatility of white dishes!  I have such fun planning the table for a party or a holiday or a company meal, using the white dishes as a "given" and pulling things together from all over the place to set a festive table.

Here are a few of our tables...

Thanksgiving 2011...brown transfer ware plates layered on white plates, brown napkins, tan hemstitch tablecloth, pewter accents, Tom turkey centerpiece.

Thanksgiving 2009...same tan hemstitch tablecloth, burgundy napkins, gingerbread leaves with piped icing names as placecards, faux fall leaves and acorns, centerpiece of pyracantha cuttings in pottery vase.

Resurrection Day 2012...centerpiece of naturally dyed eggs in antique egg basket, robin's egg blue napkins, vintage eggs place cards, blue fabric table runner.  (I wrote about the details in this post.)

Kati's 16th birthday party, a Jane Austen theme...white hemstitch table runner, burgundy napkins, floral place cards with character names, pyracantha clippings in pewter vase, pewter candlesticks.

Kati's 14th birthday party, an autumn theme...checked table cloth, burgundy napkins tied with sage ribbon with faux leaf tucked inside, place cards with leaf motif, centerpiece of autumn branches and apples tucked into an antique bean pot, pumpkin tea lights.

Company dinner (adult table)...brown check table runner, pumpkin centerpiece, pewter candlesticks with brown tapers, brown napkins, leaf-embossed napkin rings.



White dishes are the springboard to a pretty table for my guests!  

What are the basics for your table?  Do you like white dishes, or do you prefer pretty colors and patterns?  

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to see all the posts in this series!

Have you been thinking about your best hospitality tips?  

Linky Party coming up this Thursday!  

Click the button for details!

{31 Days of Hospitality} Day 14 ~ "Without Grudging"

Not to Impress, But to Bless

(Hmmm...without grudging?  Even when it is inconvenient?  Or messy?  Or costly?) 

And above all things have fervent charity among yourselves: 

for charity shall cover the multitude of sins.

Use hospitality one to another without grudging.

As every man hath received the gift, even so minister the same one to another, as good stewards of the manifold grace of God.

If any man speak, let him speak as the oracles of God; 

if any man minister, let him do it as of the ability which God giveth: 

that God in all things may be glorified through Jesus Christ, 

to whom be praise and dominion for ever and ever. 

Amen.

I Peter 4:8-11

{31 Days of Hospitality} Day 13 ~ But What Will I Serve?

Not to Impress, But to Bless

You've invited guests for dinner or you've planned a party, and now comes the stress over what you're going to serve.  You don't want to spend untold hours in the kitchen and then be too tired to enjoy your gathering.  You worry that your main course may not be a success, or that your cake will flop.  You're intimidated by the lady who is a fabulous cook, or by the man who is finicky.  

(Ask me how I know.)  

How about a few tips about menu planning?  Here goes...

Keep it simple.  

Make it easy on yourself and don't overdo it.  Keep your menu basic.  If your main dish takes time to prepare, then plan for easy or make-ahead side dishes.  Allow your guests to bring something if they offer.  A few simply prepared but delicious foods are far better than a five-course meal and a stressed hostess.  

Remember, dinner is not your only choice in entertaining.  A dessert buffet is fun.  So is an hors d'oeuvre party.  Or take-out pizza after church.  

Make it manageable and plan ahead for success.  

Ask.

If you don't know, it's okay to ask your guest about his dietary restrictions.  It's okay to ask about preferences or definite dislikes.  Although most guests are very gracious about eating what they're served, it's helpful to me as a hostess to know what will make my guests happy and comfortable.  

Serve the tried-and-true.  

I can't tell you how many times I have broken this rule!  I like to experiment in the kitchen and try new things.  But if you're stressed about cooking for company, then be sure to stick with a tried-and-true recipe.  

What are the dishes you make that always turn out?  Look to those for menu inspiration.  

Or look for new recipes before you have extended the invitation, and try them out on your family first. 

Settle on a few "go to" recipes that you can fall back on as company dishes.  

I find it helpful to scribble down the menu when I have guests for dinner.  Having a list keeps me from leaving something in the microwave or in the fridge and forgetting to serve it.  But it also serves as a reference if I invite that person again, to keep from serving the same tried-and-true meal!

And most importantly (and I hope you're not getting tired of me saying it!)...

Remember that you're not trying to impress, but to bless.  

So if your meat is a bit overdone, or your layer cake is lopsided, but you warmly welcome your guests and make them feel comfortable, wanted, and loved, then you have been a good hostess. And you have blessed.

One of my "go to" recipes is a crock pot meal that we know as Wedding Beef.  Whence the name?

When my son Ryan was engaged to my daughter-in-law Sarah, we were eating dinner together one evening, and discussing plans for the rehearsal dinner.  We were tossing about ideas for places to hold the dinner when Sarah suggested that I prepare the meal (yikes!), and that we serve it in the fellowship hall of the church where the wedding would be.  "What would we serve?" I wondered aloud, and Sarah said, "How about this?"  

"This" was the dish we were eating that night, a pulled beef recipe from the Fix It and Forget It crock pot cookbook.  And "this" was served at Ryan and Sarah's wedding rehearsal dinner, and will forevermore be known (to our family at least) as Wedding Beef.  

Not only have I served Wedding Beef at the rehearsal dinner, but it has appeared on Sunday afternoons, at extended family birthday celebrations, at weeknight meals, and at company dinners.  We serve it on big crusty rolls, and rarely have leftovers.  

I'd like to share this easy recipe with you, my blog friends.  Perhaps it will become one of your "go to" recipes too! 

WEDDING BEEF Ingredients: 3-4-lb. chuck roast 1 teaspoon salt 1 teaspoon seasoned salt 1 teaspoon pepper 1 tablespoon dried oregano 1 tablespoon garlic powder 1 or 2 sprigs of fresh rosemary* (or 1 tablespoon chopped dried rosemary) 1 cup water Directions: Combine all ingredients in crock pot. Cover and cook on LOW 6-7 hours.**   Shred meat, using two forks. ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ NOTES: * I use whole sprigs of rosemary from my herb garden.  (Little grands who are often my guests don't like the bits of rosemary in the beef.  I put the whole sprigs in for that wonderful rosemary flavor, and then take out the sprigs and the littles are none the wiser.) ** I sometimes take a shortcut by cooking on HIGH for 3-4 hours, then turning down to LOW to keep it warm until serving time.

   

{31 Days of Hospitality} Day 12 ~ The Myth of Convenience

con·ve·nient(adj.): suited to personal comfort or to easy performance

Since when is anything that is worthwhile convenient?  

Is it convenient to rise at 2 am with a nursing baby?  Or to study for a test?  Or to put your husband's needs before your own?  

Is it convenient to write a thank you note?  Or to stop your work to settle a quarrel between siblings?  Or to make your bed?  

Then why should we expect for hospitality to be convenient?  

One of my favorite homemaking blogs is Pleasant View Schoolhouse and I think that I have read every post that Anna has written.  A few years ago she told a story that has stayed with me, and the principle she shared had become my own way of thinking.  

Anna's family hosts an annual dinner for Grandpa (Anna's father-in-law), but this particular year's celebration fell at a very inconvenient time.  On the very day of the party, she and her husband had to drive out of town to pick a son up from college. They spent the day away from home, and returned with only ninety minutes to prepare dinner before their guest arrived.  Ninety minutes!  

But the statement that closed Anna's post is the one that made the impression.  She said, 

"The older I get the more I realize that it's almost never *convenient* to go to a lot of trouble for something. You just have to do it anyway. And enjoy."

So that's how I deal with my own hospitality challenge #3.  

Just do it.

Sometimes we have to plan waaaaay ahead to find a date that is clear for both the inviters and the invitees. 

Sometimes we have to just fly by the seat of our pants and do something impromptu.  

Sometimes unplanned things arise that demand a change of plans.

Sometimes it's a busy week, or the house isn't spotless, or the lawn isn't mowed.  

But who says it has to be convenient?  

Are you thinking about your hospitality tips?  Click on the button below for details!

{31 Days of Hospitality} Day 11 ~ Conversation

I am hosting a party and I'd like for you all to come!

Join us for A Linky Party!

Where: Right here at Thinking About Home

When: Thursday, October 18, 2012

Time: All day long!

What to bring: YOUR own best hospitality tips!

I am inviting YOU to write a post sharing your own tips for hospitality.  Then come over to Thinking About Home on October 18, and link up.  It'll be a fun way for all of us to share our secrets of making hospitality work for us.  You don't have a blog?  No problem!  Just write your tip(s) in the comments section that day, and I'll remind everyone to take a peek there too.  

Oh, I do love a party!

And now, on to today's topic... 


On Tuesday, we talked about challenges to hospitality, and I shared some of mine.

# 2:  Worrying about keeping the conversation flowing.  

Some of my family members are probably shaking their heads at the thought of me being speechless.  But I honestly worry about having people around my table and then running out of things to talk about!  Of course, that concern is not an issue with family, or with close friends. But what about the times when you invite someone you don't know very well?  Or an opportunity arises in which you are entertaining a stranger?  Yikes!  What can a host or hostess do to avoid those awkward moments in which nobody speaks?  

This is something that I must pre-think, depending on the group of people I am inviting.  But if I am concerned about the possibility of conversation stalls, then I must have a few ideas in place before the crash comes.

Here are a few of my keep-the-conversation-flowing strategies.  

Learn from someone who does it well. 

A couple of years ago, I was invited to a ladies' game party hosted by my friend Barbara.  She had invited five ladies, and no one except for Barbara knew all of the other guests.  Because of my own tendency to be shy with new people, I took special notice of how Barbara drew each person into the conversation.  She did it flawlessly; I doubt anyone except me even noticed how intentional she was.  But she asked the right questions, brought up things that she knew the guests had in common with one another, and encouraged stories from one lady who was quite the story teller as we all howled with laughter.  If a particular person had not said anything for a while, she'd ask that person a question to bring them back into the flow of conversation.  And she listened attentively to whomever was talking.  

I observed Barbara carefully that evening, and learned some new strategies from an excellent hostess.  Is there someone you know who is able to include everyone in a group?  Watch and learn from that host/hostess.  

Invite others who will bridge the gap.  

If you are entertaining people who you don't know well, consider inviting other guests who know them better than you do.  Or invite someone who is an easy conversationalist to be a part of the group.  Although I am probably the chattier one, Ron is much better at talking to strangers or new friends than I am, so I often defer to him in party time conversations.  

Don't be uncomfortable with an occasional lull.  

Although you don't want your conversation to totally stall, there is nothing wrong with some quiet moments, when a topic has reached its end.  Nervous chatter filling every minute is not preferable to a temporary lull.  Learn to relax and let the conversation flow naturally.  

Pre-plan some conversation topics.

Before a gathering, I have found it helpful to think of a few specific things to talk about.  

On Kati's sixteenth birthday, she invited three friends, one of whom had not met the other two. The party started with dinner together, including Ron, Bekah, and me.  To break the ice and to insure that everyone was part of the conversation, I had planned some questions.  Beginning with the birthday girl, we went around the table and each answered the two simple questions: 1) What is your middle name and is there any significance to that name? and 2) Do you collect anything?  (I already knew that each of the girls had collections, so I knew that was a safe question to ask.)  Well, you have never heard such enthusiastic talk around a table!  The simple questions led to long explanations and lots of rabbit trails, and there was not a dull moment among these new friends.  At the end of the evening, the girls planned to be Facebook friends and within an hour of returning to their homes, Facebook was buzzing with interchanges between them.

You could ask questions like "What is your earliest childhood memory? or "What would you do for a living if you weren't doing what you're doing? or "How did you come to know the Lord?"  

Even at family parties, it is sometimes fun to plan a few topics.  We have shared "the best lesson my father taught me" on Father's Day, and "one thing I like about  fill-in-the-name " at a birthday celebration.  

The key is not to make anyone uncomfortable with a topic, but think it through ahead of time, and consider the individuals who you have invited.  

Remember the purpose for your hospitality.  

Hopefully, your purpose will be "Not to Impress, But to Bless."  

If that is your purpose, then you will realize that It's Not About Me, and you will relax and enjoy your guests, making an effort to include everyone, and you will enjoy the connections of conversation.  

{31 Days of Hospitality} Day 10 ~ How to Host When Your House is FAR From Perfect

Not to Impress, But to Bless

Yesterday I told you of my own challenges to hospitality.  This was the first one:

# 1: Having people over when the house was unfinished (as in, only a room or two was even in use). 

Thankfully, this is one that I don't have to consider any more, with the possible exception of a short term remodeling project.  But in the comments section a few posts back, Tammy reminded me that it was once a huge challenge as she wondered how I managed to open my home when we were in the throes of remodeling.  

(You may want to read the background ~here~, the story of the purchase of our fixer-upper house and how we have made it our home for the past 31 years.)

So how did we have the courage to open our home when it was (very, very) unfinished?  

First of all, because we love to have people over, we just did it!  That sounds trite, but it's true.  We wanted to connect with friends and family, and we didn't want to wait until everything was perfect.  We realized that we had a long road ahead of us to get things where we wanted them to be, so waiting for completion would have meant years of missed opportunities.  Most of our guests knew that we were "fixing up" and were quite understanding, even encouraging, admiring what we were trying to accomplish.  Often, they would want the grand tour!

I had to remember that people were not coming to see my house, they were coming to visit with us, to enjoy a meal and fellowship.  

Of course, there were practical things to consider.

If a project was at its height (think layers of plaster dust, holes in the wall, giant tarps covering window openings...yep), then we sure didn't plan a party!  (For goodness' sake, we could hardly get meals on the table for ourselves during those intense times!)  We'd wait for some lesser mess or for a time between projects to invite guests.  (And there were plenty of those in-between-projects times as we waited for finances to catch up to our grand plans.)

We had to consider the season.  We had no air conditioning and no one wanted to be in a hot, humid house in July, so most of our summer entertaining consisted of outdoor birthday parties.  We also did very little entertaining in the wintertime in those early years, as the farmhouse had old rattly windows and no insulation and could be cold and drafty.

We also had to consider the rooms that were available!  Just before we moved into the house, we made some simple, hasty improvements to the kitchen, and for several years, that was the only room that was available for company.  It is actually the largest room in the house, so it was okay.  No one seemed to mind that the door was closed to the next room.  It was kind of like a little efficiency apartment.  The next room that we renovated was the living room, which extended our party space by an entire room!  The last room we did was the dining room.  There is a whole story there...including planning a big fiftieth birthday party for my dad and planning on having this space and choosing to paint the room in a colonial mustard color which turned out to be not a colonial mustard color and going back to have the paint remixed and slapping paint on the trim right up to the day of the party...but I won't go there in this post.  The point is, we made do with what we had, and people were so gracious about their expectations.

Although our house was far from perfect, far from even being complete, I added little touches to make it a comfortable cheery place for our family, and a welcoming place for guests.  I made some red calico place mats and some blue checked napkins for our table.  I made pillows for our sleeper sofa that was our loveseat/bed in the kitchen.  Ron crafted some little wooden houses and a chicken napkin holder (remember, this was the 80's and "country" was in!), and I painted them.  We decorated and tidied our small area to make it a pleasant place to be...even if there was a disaster area on the other side of the door!


Looking back, I am so glad that we opened our imperfect home to others, and lived and loved and made precious memories.  We can't get those years back.

Tomorrow, I'll be talking about Challenge #2:  

keeping conversation flowing.  

{31 Days of Hospitality} Day 9 ~ Challenges

Not to Impress, But to Bless

Can you think of someone for whom you think that hospitality is easy?  That certain someone whose home is open and warm and welcoming?  That friend who makes it look effortless?  

I have a theory.  I'll bet that even that person faces challenges in entertaining, a thing or two that causes her concern or makes her confidence waver.  

Today, I am going to share some of my own hospitality challenges, and in the next few days, I will tell you how I have overcome them, or how I am continuing to overcome them.  

Challenge #1:  

Having people over when the house was unfinished (as in, only a room or two was even in use).

Challenge #2:

Worrying about keeping the conversation flowing.  

Challenge # 3:

Finding a convenient time.

Challenge #4:

Indecision about the menu. 

Do you know someone who seems to have it all together when it comes to hospitality?

What are your challenges to entertaining?  

{31 Days of Hospitality} Day 8 ~ A True Life Story

Not to Impress, But to Bless

Last Thursday, our family was blessed by the warm and welcoming hospitality of my friend Deanna and her precious family.  There was a little something atypical about our visit in their home.  Neither of us had ever met before!  

But that's only partly true.  Deanna and I had met about a year ago...through our blogs!  We began conversing through our blog comments, and over the course of the year we have exchanged many emails and shared encouragement and prayer needs and family stories and a few laughs.  We were kindred spirits, we two.  

So when our family decided to take a little vacation, including several days in Lancaster, I emailed Deanna to see if we could meet.  Yes!  Not only could we meet, but Tim was on vacation the very same week and we were invited to their home...for dinner!  (Oh what gracious hospitality!)  

On Thursday evening, we pulled into the Rabes' driveway (recognizing the lovely cottage garden from Deanna's blog), and as we got out of our van, our friends came out of their house with smiles and greetings.  Deanna greeted me with a warm embrace as she said, "Welcome."  

We felt welcome.  

How those moments flew by!  We gathered around their large table, laden with good things to eat.  Tim prayed a prayer of blessing, and we were off...passing around heaping platters and bowls of food, getting to know one another, exchanging stories, laughing at Kyle (7) who is sooooo cute.  Pie and coffee, more chatting, and before we knew it, it was time for Part Two of the evening, an amazing show at Sight and Sound theater.  (Two of the Rabes work at Sight and Sound and were able to procure tickets for all of us!)  

As the evening drew to a close, we lingered in the parking lot, reluctant to say good-bye to our friends.  

There are lessons to be learned about hospitality in a visit to the Rabes' home.

Their hospitality began as they came out to warmly greet us.

They were genuine.  We did not get the feeling that they were trying to impress.  They were simply being who they are, and extending blessing to us.  

They were relaxed.  Thus, we were relaxed.  (Have you ever visited someone who was nervous about you being there?  Were you able to relax and enjoy the time spent together?  Or were you worried about whether you were meeting their expectations?)  

The entire family worked together to create an atmosphere of service.  Rachel had made the delicious bread.  Tim made the coffee and served us.  Everyone pitched in to clean up.  Sarah made (quiet) Bekah feel welcome and took her on a house tour while Lindsay chatted it up with Kati. 

We felt like honored guests.  

I believe that when the Rabes open their home, it is not to impress, but to bless.

Thank you, friends, for the warm hospitality you extended to us.

*** You can read Deanna's account of our evening by clicking ~here~!